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Saturday, June 20, 2015

To My Hero, With All My Heart...Happy Father's Day!

I hit the jackpot when I found my husband. You know what one of the first things he did for me that really got me? The first morning we spent together, he brought me a cup of coffee with creamer while I was getting ready. No one had ever done that for me before. I know you're probably thinking, "wow, that didn't take much." But if you knew where I had been before, this was HUGE. I felt loved, completely, with that one cup of coffee. It's the little things, people!

He truly is a wonderful man and it is even difficult to put into words describing the way that I feel about him. I've been broken and lonely, not appreciated, used but then he showed me the opposite. Immediately, I knew he would be my forever man.

It didn't take long for us to want to stop the 6.5 hours drives on the weekends to see each other. After 6 months of living together we got engaged and 10 days later...became HUSBAND & WIFE. When you know, you know. It was a quick ceremony at the lake that we now live by. We held a reception 8 months later and decided that we wanted to start a family.

It wasn't long until I saw two pink lines! Me telling him wasn't all planned out and nicely done as other couples. I seriously just shook the test in his face with happiness before running off to work for the day. We couldn't believe it and were very excited, nervous, scared, anxious...all of the feelings! With the way that he was a husband to me, I knew he would be a great father. So I really had no worries.

Finally in June 2014, our little man was born! It was amazing to see what we had made together. Life is such a miracle! Also, I never had to change a diaper in the hospital...daddy did that!

My husband works a lot and it is so I can stay home with our son. Daycare wasn't really an option where we live and deep down inside I knew I wanted to raise my children. So, I've gotten to stay home and watch our son grow up and do his firsts, which is truly a blessing. I'm not going to lie, my days lately have been very "trying." I am currently pregnant with baby #2 and my hormones are sometimes off the wall. Dealing with a whiny, teething, needy, temper tantrum throwing toddler isn't exactly peachy.

Luckily, I have a spouse who comes home every night and helps me. Unless there's yard work or rare occasions that he is outside or gone. I don't know if I could do it without him and I hope that I never have to find out. He works all day, comes home and sometimes even cooks when I don't feel like it, gives our son his bath, spends time with him and gives me a break! All without ever complaining. He never makes me feel selfish or bad for wanting/needing to go to town to get a fish sandwich that I crave or just to get out for sanity. I am very grateful for that. He still does little things that makes me feel loved, such as that first cup of coffee. I love him more every day.

So to my hero, my husband...thank you and Happy Father's Day!

Tuesday, June 16, 2015

Defeated.



Is there a button that turns your frown upside down? I could use one of those. [Today has been one of those ugly cry days.]

Hi. I'm Kelley, mom to a 1 year old who is very strong willed and needy, lately. Wife to a man I like to clean and cook for but don't always live up to. Things I like to do for myself? Shop (in which I'm limited to - thanks money for not growing on trees!), everything Scentsy (recently became a consultant), go out and do things (sometimes restricting due to child and/or money still not growing on trees), help others, have a clean house, make good food, bake cookies for loved ones, make my son laugh...the list could go on and on.

Even though I know it is not physically, emotionally or mentally possible to complete all of the wonderful things I have listed in my head on a daily basis, I still strive to and end up disappointed. To be honest, the last couple of days, my main focus is to let go of all of the "mundane house tasks" and enjoy time with my son but I still feel defeated. Yes, maybe being 5 months pregnant, tired, achy all over, emotional and over-analyzing everything that everyone else is doing doesn't help my situation. I just want to make my son happy and he is in a phase where that is not always possible, no matter how much time I spend with him. I take it personally, which totally sucks. I know he's not, not enjoying things, on purpose but it still hurts. Also, I am in a stage of wanting/needing a good friend to hang out with that has a kid or maybe if I could clone my sister, it would make my life a little less lonely.

So, I think I'm just going to take him out to the park at the lake. Maybe grab some food before hand and have a little picnic (or a chase him around while trying to shove food in his mouth and mine at the same time thing). And turn this frown around myself. Seriously though, if you have one of those buttons...name your price! ;)